Ok, ladies and gents...
First, let's talk about the definition of
-- Haphazard's, Stray's and Random's: Lacking a definite plan, purpose or pattern. Made, done, happening, or chosen without method or conscious decision.
I had to ask myself... What in my life is random? And while I came up with a nice list, One thing in particular stood out to me... MEN.
Yes, I said men. I have Random's. Random men/women are people that you KNOW will never be beneficial to your life. Friends and Random's are different. Let's be clear.
I hear women and men alike, including myself, say all the time.... "I want to be in a fulfilling relationship" .. "I want to be married" ... Blah blah blah. But how in the world can that happen, if everything you do is sporadic, no consistency? Let's go further.. How can God do a great work in you, if you have a bunch of random people running in and out of your life, taking your focus off of Him? (I got deep there, I know)
How are Random's used: (these are only examples, and are not true in every case) Free Meals, Sex, Boredom Fixer - by way of text or call, outings, including but not limited to; movies, bowling.. I mean you get where I'm going here.
Is there anything wrong with going out, OF COURSE NOT! The problem comes, when the motives are different. The problem also comes when you say you're looking for something that you know you'll never find in your Random's.
Now, cutting off Random's doesn't just mean YOUR Random's.. It is also referring to people who have made YOU their random.
1. IF he/she ONLY calls/texts you when they're bored, you're more than likely a random. You have no value to them when they're not bored... And if they're ALWAYS bored, then maybe they need to be getting a life instead of calling you.
2. IF he/she ONLY calls/texts you when they're horny (oop, y'all weren't ready -- #thegetrealmovement) YES, we all have them.. The conversation usually starts with "what's up", "whatchu doin" and the word "chill," or it's equivalent, is usually in the mix. They may even ask you how your day was. These calls usually creep in at night, leading into the next day. Stop acting as if your confused or shocked, because you know what it is. They need to be cut off. Because ultimately, your letting someone else dictate your worth for you, and your going along with it. Do you really think that God will be molding your Adam, your Boaz, your Eve, your Ruth while your up under someone else's... I think not!
Side note: We all know that everything belongs to God.. But let me break it down... anything that God did not ordain in your life, DOES NOT BELONG TO YOU!! So, let me explain my statement, "....while you're up under someone else's" it does not mean that that person is in a relationship with someone else. They could actually be YOUR boyfriend/girlfriend, BUT.. If it isn't God-led.. God-centered... And God-ordained.. It isn't yours! And your sleeping with and loving on.. Someone else's ministry.. And vice versa.
3. IF he/she ONLY calls/texts you when they want to have conversations, but they're short with you when you initiate contact... I mean, do I really have to explain this...
We all have to start looking for the signs!
Everyone that knows me, knows that one of my favorite scriptures to quote is, 1 Corinthians 14:33 "For God is not the author of confusion, but of peace, as in all churches of the saints."
God WILL NOT put you in a situation where you have to figure out your value. Your value is written all over His Word! Just the fact that you were made in His Image should give you enough confidence to get through your day.
Our Random's, Haphazard's and Stray's serve no purpose in our life but to fulfill the areas and times in our life that are void. If everytime you feel a void, you call a random... How much time are you spending with God? Do you know that at the times you feel the loneliest and the lowest are some of the best times to commune with the Holy Spirit? At those times, your are most vulnerable to his Word!!!
Just to let you know, as long as your answering to your Random's and being someone else's Random... Your Adam will remain sleep. And sooner or later, he'll wake up, and it won't be you that he recognizes.. It'll be someone else.. And you'll still be in Randomville! Men, the Eve, that came from YOUR rib, will one day be recognized by another.. That's got to be painful.. But you'll still be in Randomville too... You probably won't even notice until you're done with the games. She'll be long gone!
Get it together! Who do you want to be? What do you want to be?
TIPS:
1. Erase "random" phone numbers
2. Erase "random" text message threads
3. Be honest with your random, if you must have the conversation
4. You don't owe explanations, you're grown
5. Don't be afraid to say NO, it works, if you stick to your guns
6. Your Random's, or one of your Random's may be a really nice person. Sweet and generous, but they're still a random.. And if they serve no purpose, then they are not needed in your life. You still have Cut it off!
7. Ask God for eyes to see! So that you won't be bamboozled again
8. Y'all are gonna call me crazy.. But practice celibacy.. Even if you have to give yourself a timeframe.. In that time frame, commune with God, at the time you'd call a random... I promise, you'll start seeing people for who they are, EARLY!
9. Don't sell Yourself short!!! You're worth every penny of the price paid at Calvery!
10. YOU'RE MORE THAN A RANDOM!
